Allhumans are in constant need for love and affection and this leadsmost of us into relationships. However, some relationships can be tootaxing emotionally especially if one’s partner is controlling.Controlling partners have heaps of accusations to make their fellowpartners feel inferior and maintain dominance over them. They rendertheir partners into abusive relationships unaware, thus making themfeel bad.
Narcissisticpersonality disorder is a psychological deficit that makes someone bein constant need for admiration and respect, although they lackrespect for other’s boundaries and needs (Kohut23-25).Sociopaths, on the other hand, is a personality disorder that willnormally develop at around the age of 15 and is characterised by lackof respect for other people’s rights (Kohut29-31).When someone has either of these personality disorders, they are mostlikely to be controlling and rigid in decision making when they getinto a relationship. Asociopath will always issue threats against their partner, forinstance, threatening to end the relationship and even theirpartner’s life (Boniorpara. 3).Anarcissistic partner will otherwise try to show their fellow partnerthat they are not worth them due to their self-sufficiency (Boniorpara.15). They claim that their partners love them because of somepositive things that they do, something that Carl Rogers refers to asa “conditional love regard” (Wade et al. 21). Narcissisticpartners are less keen on listening to their partner’s needs, andthis make them controlling and hard to cope with (Boniorpara.10).
Oneof my friends fell into such a relationship and after sharing with mesome of the ordeals, I understood how much such relationships bringabout emotional distress. Her partner was always suspicious, so heended up snooping in her phone and even in her friends’ phone tosee the conversations they had. More so, every time she tried to tellhim about her needs, it always ended up in an argument. After everysimple argument, he threatened to end the relationship and evenexpose her nudes to the internet. She however, after much thought,decided to terminate the abusive relationship and sure to his word,he posted her nudes on social media, a move that has made themenemies up to date.
Bonior,Andrea. "20 Signs Your Partner Is Controlling." PsychologyToday.N.p., 2015. Web. 13 Apr. 2017.
Kohut,Heinz. Theanalysis of the self: A systematic approach to the psychoanalytictreatment of narcissistic personality disorders.University of Chicago Press, 2013.
Wade,Carole, Carol Tavris, and Maryanne Garry. Invitationto Psychology.Pearson Higher Ed, 2014.
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